Dear Yanks,
James A. Garfield!!! Why do you not know who he is?
He was a better president than the orange dotard who is currently fucking your country into the ground.
Yours with much malice,
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Open Letter To....
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Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
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PsYcHo
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Re: Open Letter To....
Dear Code-man,
I miss you little buddy. You weren't "disabled" to me, you were someone who I aspired to be. Despite the hand that fate had dealt you, you always looked to the positive. I hated when people pitied you, for there was no need for the pity, lest they were gauging themselves by the example you set, and found their own faults compounded.
At the time "retarded" was an acceptable term, and those same people seemed grateful that they weren't "afflicted" with the same challenges as you.
If those same people had spent a minuscule amount of time actually getting to know you, they would have seen how vastly superior your intellect was to theirs, if only they considered the things of true importance.
So you couldn't do math at all; that wasn't necessary. Despite your motor control limitations, you could still kill at Pac-man, until it got too fast for your hands to negotiate. And despite how you pretended to not know how to play checkers, you were a damn fine checker player. Other people thought you cheated on accident; I know (and called you out on) cheating on purpose, despite the fact that you always let the other person win in the end. You just wanted to prolong the game. Much as you asked questions you already knew the answer to ( I know you NEVER forgot any person who had ever told you their name) just to keep people talking to you.
You asked the same questions to keep people talking, because you knew talking about themselves made them happy. You cheated at checkers to make the game go on longer, but let everyone win because you knew winning makes people happy. You played dumb at times because you thought that would make people happy, but you showed me your gifts because you knew I didn't pity you, and you knew it would make me happy.
Some people thought you were challenged, yet you dialed at least thirty numbers from memory to talk to people. You pretended not to know the peoples names you asked about, but if they bothered to ask you "What's the name of that barber who cut your hair 8 years ago when we were on vacation and you only saw once?", you'd immediately answer with the correct name, and any other details he had told you. And these people thought YOU were the one with the disability.
You were my dearest relative, and I miss you greatly. I couldn't speak at my adopted mother's funeral, because I have a severe aversion to public speaking outside of work related, and as "Mom" wouldn't have approved of me being under the influence at her funeral, I was as sober as the preacher. Your funeral had hundreds of people there, and I took the stage with no problem; after consuming a pint of whiskey which I knew you couldn't have cared less about. (Apparently I was quite eloquent; I have no idea what I said in particular, but I remember the gist. I'll have to see if someone recorded it so I can see what I said.) And if there is an afterlife, I know you wouldn't care in the least about my being intoxicated. You'd only be glad that I was there. But if there is an afterlife, boy- you and me are gonna settle the score on our last checker game. You only beat me because I was anticipating you throwing the game as usual, but you wanted to win because I told you that you could, and you knew it would make me happy to see you actually try. I wasn't prepared you bastard! (I can picture you laughing at that right now, and putting your head to the side as you say " Uncle PsYcHo, I just,.. I just wanted you to play again"...
)
I miss you C man.
PsYcHo
I miss you little buddy. You weren't "disabled" to me, you were someone who I aspired to be. Despite the hand that fate had dealt you, you always looked to the positive. I hated when people pitied you, for there was no need for the pity, lest they were gauging themselves by the example you set, and found their own faults compounded.
At the time "retarded" was an acceptable term, and those same people seemed grateful that they weren't "afflicted" with the same challenges as you.
If those same people had spent a minuscule amount of time actually getting to know you, they would have seen how vastly superior your intellect was to theirs, if only they considered the things of true importance.
So you couldn't do math at all; that wasn't necessary. Despite your motor control limitations, you could still kill at Pac-man, until it got too fast for your hands to negotiate. And despite how you pretended to not know how to play checkers, you were a damn fine checker player. Other people thought you cheated on accident; I know (and called you out on) cheating on purpose, despite the fact that you always let the other person win in the end. You just wanted to prolong the game. Much as you asked questions you already knew the answer to ( I know you NEVER forgot any person who had ever told you their name) just to keep people talking to you.
You asked the same questions to keep people talking, because you knew talking about themselves made them happy. You cheated at checkers to make the game go on longer, but let everyone win because you knew winning makes people happy. You played dumb at times because you thought that would make people happy, but you showed me your gifts because you knew I didn't pity you, and you knew it would make me happy.
Some people thought you were challenged, yet you dialed at least thirty numbers from memory to talk to people. You pretended not to know the peoples names you asked about, but if they bothered to ask you "What's the name of that barber who cut your hair 8 years ago when we were on vacation and you only saw once?", you'd immediately answer with the correct name, and any other details he had told you. And these people thought YOU were the one with the disability.
You were my dearest relative, and I miss you greatly. I couldn't speak at my adopted mother's funeral, because I have a severe aversion to public speaking outside of work related, and as "Mom" wouldn't have approved of me being under the influence at her funeral, I was as sober as the preacher. Your funeral had hundreds of people there, and I took the stage with no problem; after consuming a pint of whiskey which I knew you couldn't have cared less about. (Apparently I was quite eloquent; I have no idea what I said in particular, but I remember the gist. I'll have to see if someone recorded it so I can see what I said.) And if there is an afterlife, I know you wouldn't care in the least about my being intoxicated. You'd only be glad that I was there. But if there is an afterlife, boy- you and me are gonna settle the score on our last checker game. You only beat me because I was anticipating you throwing the game as usual, but you wanted to win because I told you that you could, and you knew it would make me happy to see you actually try. I wasn't prepared you bastard! (I can picture you laughing at that right now, and putting your head to the side as you say " Uncle PsYcHo, I just,.. I just wanted you to play again"...
)I miss you C man.
PsYcHo
Alcohol may have been a factor.
Taxation is theft.
Taxation is theft.
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PsYcHo
- Master of the Forum
- Posts: 1166
- Joined: Tue Jan 26, 2016 10:24 pm
- Diet: Pescetarian
Re: Open Letter To....
Dear drug dealer(s) down the street,
You are going to get caught if you don't tell your idiotic friends/customers to be more discrete. I haven't even smoked pot in years, but the constant traffic from your house is telling, plus the less than five minutes your "guests" spend on average is the equivalent of a neon sign saying "Get your drugs here!". Tell the damn people to stop blasting their bass, dropping off people then coming back in five minutes to pick them up, and especially to stop spinning out at the end of the street to look cool in their shitty truck/ car with rims more valuable than the actual car. This isn't the projects, it's a decent neighborhood, and if I figured out just because I don't smoke cigs indoors, surely your closer neighbors are also aware.
Fucking amateurs.
PsYcHo
You are going to get caught if you don't tell your idiotic friends/customers to be more discrete. I haven't even smoked pot in years, but the constant traffic from your house is telling, plus the less than five minutes your "guests" spend on average is the equivalent of a neon sign saying "Get your drugs here!". Tell the damn people to stop blasting their bass, dropping off people then coming back in five minutes to pick them up, and especially to stop spinning out at the end of the street to look cool in their shitty truck/ car with rims more valuable than the actual car. This isn't the projects, it's a decent neighborhood, and if I figured out just because I don't smoke cigs indoors, surely your closer neighbors are also aware.
Fucking amateurs.
PsYcHo
Alcohol may have been a factor.
Taxation is theft.
Taxation is theft.
-
PsYcHo
- Master of the Forum
- Posts: 1166
- Joined: Tue Jan 26, 2016 10:24 pm
- Diet: Pescetarian
Re: Open Letter To....
Dear D.,
I know I was loud tonight, and it woke you up.
I don't care. I was loud, because I was cleaning the dishes and living room, because the person we both care about prefers to wake up to a clean house.
You and I both drink too much, but I still try to be courteous when I'm drunk; your an insufferable ass. And I love how you don't bitch and moan to me. You do it to her, but... she tells me everything you dumbass.
She's too nice to you because you're her father. You may have noticed over the decade we've been together she isn't the shy, non-confrontational type anymore. That's my fault, and I'm glad of it. If I die before her, she can take care of herself, and won't tolerate any bullshit. She only tolerates your's to the degree she does because your her dad. But those times when I've "set you straight",.. she's the reason.
When you piss her off, she tells me, and then I intentionally piss you off.
I'm just waiting for you to get the balls to bitch about it to me. And since it seems you may not be willing to do so, know that you're about to get an earful from me. I want us all to get along, but I was raised a lot differently than you' all.
Say your mind, or stop with the whiny passive aggressive bullshit. I've done this once or twice before, but this time you have absolutely no ground to stand upon, and I'll hurt your feelings bad.
PsYcHo
I know I was loud tonight, and it woke you up.
I don't care. I was loud, because I was cleaning the dishes and living room, because the person we both care about prefers to wake up to a clean house.
You and I both drink too much, but I still try to be courteous when I'm drunk; your an insufferable ass. And I love how you don't bitch and moan to me. You do it to her, but... she tells me everything you dumbass.
She's too nice to you because you're her father. You may have noticed over the decade we've been together she isn't the shy, non-confrontational type anymore. That's my fault, and I'm glad of it. If I die before her, she can take care of herself, and won't tolerate any bullshit. She only tolerates your's to the degree she does because your her dad. But those times when I've "set you straight",.. she's the reason.
When you piss her off, she tells me, and then I intentionally piss you off.
I'm just waiting for you to get the balls to bitch about it to me. And since it seems you may not be willing to do so, know that you're about to get an earful from me. I want us all to get along, but I was raised a lot differently than you' all.
Say your mind, or stop with the whiny passive aggressive bullshit. I've done this once or twice before, but this time you have absolutely no ground to stand upon, and I'll hurt your feelings bad.
PsYcHo
Alcohol may have been a factor.
Taxation is theft.
Taxation is theft.
-
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
- Master of the Forum
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Re: Open Letter To....
Dear John McDonnell,
I feel quite sorry for you sometimes due to the fact that I believe you are overlooked by many people in favour of Jeremy Corbyn. Many of these so-called "Corbynistas" don't know who you even are and this is due to the fact that they are not true Corbynites as they couldn't actually care less about Jezza but are just hopping on the bandwagon.
I watched a while back an episode of the comedy programme "Tracey Breaks the News". In it was a sketch featuring you and Corbyn. What happened was a man came up and asked Corbyn for a selfie. When he had done that, you asked "Do you want one with me, John McDonnell?" and he looked at you like "Who is this guy?".
I reckon that this is true to reality. And here is why:
I was lucky enough to attend the Labour Party conference in 2017. I left the talk I was attending about Artificial Intelligence because I realized that if I stayed for it, I wouldn't be able to see the talk you were doing about small businesses. I figured "This could be the one chance I could get to see John McDonnell", so I left.
After you had finished the talk, I had my picture taken with you. I was abuzz with joy. I then asked if you could sign my Labour Party Manifesto, and you complied. But once you had done so, you asked "Has Jeremy signed it yet?"
Even then, you thought that I was only there to see you due to your relations with Jeremy Corbyn. This saddens me.
I want you to know that I value you.
Yours with love,
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
I feel quite sorry for you sometimes due to the fact that I believe you are overlooked by many people in favour of Jeremy Corbyn. Many of these so-called "Corbynistas" don't know who you even are and this is due to the fact that they are not true Corbynites as they couldn't actually care less about Jezza but are just hopping on the bandwagon.
I watched a while back an episode of the comedy programme "Tracey Breaks the News". In it was a sketch featuring you and Corbyn. What happened was a man came up and asked Corbyn for a selfie. When he had done that, you asked "Do you want one with me, John McDonnell?" and he looked at you like "Who is this guy?".
I reckon that this is true to reality. And here is why:
I was lucky enough to attend the Labour Party conference in 2017. I left the talk I was attending about Artificial Intelligence because I realized that if I stayed for it, I wouldn't be able to see the talk you were doing about small businesses. I figured "This could be the one chance I could get to see John McDonnell", so I left.
After you had finished the talk, I had my picture taken with you. I was abuzz with joy. I then asked if you could sign my Labour Party Manifesto, and you complied. But once you had done so, you asked "Has Jeremy signed it yet?"
Even then, you thought that I was only there to see you due to your relations with Jeremy Corbyn. This saddens me.
I want you to know that I value you.
Yours with love,
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
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Red
- Supporter
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Re: Open Letter To....
Dear that area in Fresh Meadows,
Why the fuck don't you assholes have bike racks? I don't have my license yet, so my only means of effective transportation is my bicycle. You have some pretty good damn stores in the area, so I, as an American, and semi-consumer, am drawn to it. So, why don't you cocksuckers have a place for me to legally lock my bike? Sure, I got the street signs, but since I'm a law abiding citizen for the most part, I don't put my shit where I'm sure it doesn't belong. I've called you assholes like 6 times and emailed you about 11 times about this, and I have not been given a productive response or have seen any visible change. What, is it that you people are too good for bike racks? If so, bite my cock.
I remember the other day I was riding my bike to get to the Library store, and wasted about 40 minutes of my fucking time just looking for a place to lock my bike. I looked up and down for one, and I couldn't find one within 50 feet of the area. I was riding and eventually found a single bike rack out side the insurance office, and boy did my dick get hard. It went flaccid about 17 seconds later when I realized I had to do a shitload of walking. Do something about this now, or else I will be very, very angry with you. And I will write you guys an open letter telling you guys how angry I am.
All best, and a sincere fuck you,
President Red, 1st President of Red's Democratic Republic
Why the fuck don't you assholes have bike racks? I don't have my license yet, so my only means of effective transportation is my bicycle. You have some pretty good damn stores in the area, so I, as an American, and semi-consumer, am drawn to it. So, why don't you cocksuckers have a place for me to legally lock my bike? Sure, I got the street signs, but since I'm a law abiding citizen for the most part, I don't put my shit where I'm sure it doesn't belong. I've called you assholes like 6 times and emailed you about 11 times about this, and I have not been given a productive response or have seen any visible change. What, is it that you people are too good for bike racks? If so, bite my cock.
I remember the other day I was riding my bike to get to the Library store, and wasted about 40 minutes of my fucking time just looking for a place to lock my bike. I looked up and down for one, and I couldn't find one within 50 feet of the area. I was riding and eventually found a single bike rack out side the insurance office, and boy did my dick get hard. It went flaccid about 17 seconds later when I realized I had to do a shitload of walking. Do something about this now, or else I will be very, very angry with you. And I will write you guys an open letter telling you guys how angry I am.
All best, and a sincere fuck you,
President Red, 1st President of Red's Democratic Republic
Learning never exhausts the mind.
-Leonardo da Vinci
-Leonardo da Vinci
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Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
- Master of the Forum
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Re: Open Letter To....
Dear Mr President,Red wrote: ↑Sat Aug 18, 2018 8:43 pm Dear that area in Fresh Meadows,
Why the fuck don't you assholes have bike racks? I don't have my license yet, so my only means of effective transportation is my bicycle. You have some pretty good damn stores in the area, so I, as an American, and semi-consumer, am drawn to it. So, why don't you cocksuckers have a place for me to legally lock my bike? Sure, I got the street signs, but since I'm a law abiding citizen for the most part, I don't put my shit where I'm sure it doesn't belong. I've called you assholes like 6 times and emailed you about 11 times about this, and I have not been given a productive response or have seen any visible change. What, is it that you people are too good for bike racks? If so, bite my cock.
I remember the other day I was riding my bike to get to the Library store, and wasted about 40 minutes of my fucking time just looking for a place to lock my bike. I looked up and down for one, and I couldn't find one within 50 feet of the area. I was riding and eventually found a single bike rack out side the insurance office, and boy did my dick get hard. It went flaccid about 17 seconds later when I realized I had to do a shitload of walking. Do something about this now, or else I will be very, very angry with you. And I will write you guys an open letter telling you guys how angry I am.
All best, and a sincere fuck you,
President Red, 1st President of Red's Democratic Republic
Yours with admiration,
Vice President Blue, 1st Vice President of Red's Democratic Republic and nuclear safety inspector
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Red
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Re: Open Letter To....
Dear Mr. Vice President
Thanks for resizing ot for me. How did you do that?
Thanks for resizing ot for me. How did you do that?
Learning never exhausts the mind.
-Leonardo da Vinci
-Leonardo da Vinci
-
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
- Master of the Forum
- Posts: 1209
- Joined: Sun Feb 21, 2016 5:57 am
- Diet: Ostrovegan
- Location: The Matrix
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Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
- Master of the Forum
- Posts: 1209
- Joined: Sun Feb 21, 2016 5:57 am
- Diet: Ostrovegan
- Location: The Matrix
Re: Open Letter To....
Dear Mr. President,
Can you do a picture like that for me?
Yours faithfully,
Vice President Blue/Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz?