Philosophical Vegan Forum

Red wrote: ↑Tue Jan 16, 2018 7:30 pm Bill Gates: Right Eye

The only person I would actually look forward to penetrating me and he does it in that area! Well, really!

I wish Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz gets his next wish granted without consequence.

Wish granted! My wish is that you get sent into a fiery pit of hell where Hitler and Mussolini are forced to keep biting off your testicles and then they keep regrowing and then they bite them off again. You also have a heron that willingly comes in every once in a while that pecks out your eyes and then they regrow and the heron pecks them out again. And there is unpleasant music playing non-stop that literally makes your ears bleed.

My actual wish is that RedAppleGP would think of a wish that does not involve me in some bizarre way. Please grant this with consequence thank you.

Red wrote: ↑Tue Jan 16, 2018 7:30 pm First, they cut your neck ever so slightly so that you're still alive, then they pour a salt and whiskey solution into the open wound, and insert a scorpion into it. Then they leave you to die in an old cell filled with your own waste.

So, a typical Thursday in Tijuana? (I named my scorpion Vladimir.)

Red wrote: ↑Tue Jan 16, 2018 7:30 pm I wish Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz gets his next wish granted without consequence.

Wish granted! But...

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz gets his next wish granted without consequence.

I wish that the consequences for Zzzzzzzzzz next wish would be imparted upon the wish granter as well.

PsYcHo wrote: ↑Wed Jan 17, 2018 3:14 am

Red wrote: ↑Tue Jan 16, 2018 7:30 pm First, they cut your neck ever so slightly so that you're still alive, then they pour a salt and whiskey solution into the open wound, and insert a scorpion into it. Then they leave you to die in an old cell filled with your own waste.

So, a typical Thursday in Tijuana? (I named my scorpion Vladimir.)

Red wrote: ↑Tue Jan 16, 2018 7:30 pm I wish Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz gets his next wish granted without consequence.

Wish granted! But...

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz gets his next wish granted without consequence.

I wish that the consequences for Zzzzzzzzzz next wish would be imparted upon the wish granter as well.

Since we appear to have been writing a response to his wish at the same time, I have decided that the next person to play the game, grants this wish, which is a combination of both our wishes:

I wish RedAppleGP (or anybody else for that matter) was able to come up wish a wish that didn't involve me in some way, and that the consequences of this wish was imparted upon the wish granter as well.

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz wrote: I wish RedAppleGP (or anybody else for that matter) was able to come up wish a wish that didn't involve me in some way, and that the consequences of this wish was imparted upon the wish granter as well.

Wish granted, now everyone's genitals are permanently swollen.

I wish I was in the Land of Cotton.

Red wrote: ↑Fri Feb 23, 2018 12:09 am

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz wrote: I wish RedAppleGP (or anybody else for that matter) was able to come up wish a wish that didn't involve me in some way, and that the consequences of this wish was imparted upon the wish granter as well.

Wish granted, now everyone's genitals are permanently swollen.

I wish I was in the Land of Cotton.

Wish granted!

You fight for the Confederacy in the civil war, and when you lose and the United States takes control of your territory, it becomes overtaken by Radical Republican. However, in this timeline they are a lot harsher towards ex-Confederate soldiers. The punishment for your treachery against the union is being sold into slavery. You get sold to Jon Arbuckle. One day your master Jon tells you to find his pipe and then you look for his pipe and you find that his cat Garfield is smoking it. You tell your master Jon that his cat Garfield is smoking the pipe but he doesn't believe you and when you show him that Garfield is indeed smoking the pipe, Garfield says that he was framed. Because Jon trusts his cat over a traitor to the union, he whips you until your back is bleeding and he continues to whip you until he becomes tired and then he tells Garfield to keep clawing at your back. Garfield keeps clawing at your back while Jon is sleeping. Even though Garfield is a lazy cat, he is also a patriot and will not let a traitor to the union go unpunished. Then, when Jon awakes well-rested, he gets his whip again and starts whipping you for the whole day while Garfield sleeps. This is your life: Jon whips you all day and Garfield claws at you all night. You also have Odie who comes and urinates all over you. You are actually lucky that Odie is such a stupid dog because if he knew what a disgusting traitor you were he would do far more than just urinate on you. Anyway in 1881 after many years of this you get tired of being whipped and clawed and urinated on, and run away. You get on a train to Washington D.C. and then go to the Batimore and Potomac Railroad Station where you run directly in the firing line of Charles J. Guiteau who intends to shoot James A. Garfield but ends up shooting you instead. So it is you who dies slowly and painfully with incompetent doctors who can't find where the bullet is lodged in you, while James A. Garfield goes on to become the greatest President in U.S. history.

I wish that Kim Jong-un was the President of the United States.

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz wrote: ↑Fri Feb 23, 2018 10:43 am I wish that Kim Jong-un was the President of the United States.

Wish granted!

Unfortunately, to be POTUS, Kim Jong had to renounce his North Korean citizenship, wait until he was eligible for citizenship in the US, sponsor a law to allow naturalized citizens to run for the presidency, then win the election. All of which he did!

Unfortunately, the relative that replaced him as the Dictator of North Korea worried that he (Un) may have been trying to rule both 'Murica and North Korea. He sent an assassin to attend a presidential "meet and greet", and the assassin spread poison all over Kim Jong-un's face, and he died. At his autopsy, it was discovered that he had the tiniest penis ever on record, and he made it into the Guinness Book of World Records.

I wish Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz and Red would finally end the tension, and make out already. and let me watch in the background

PsYcHo wrote: ↑Fri Feb 23, 2018 11:51 pm

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz wrote: ↑Fri Feb 23, 2018 10:43 am I wish that Kim Jong-un was the President of the United States.

Wish granted!

Unfortunately, to be POTUS, Kim Jong had to renounce his North Korean citizenship, wait until he was eligible for citizenship in the US, sponsor a law to allow naturalized citizens to run for the presidency, then win the election. All of which he did!

Unfortunately, the relative that replaced him as the Dictator of North Korea worried that he (Un) may have been trying to rule both 'Murica and North Korea. He sent an assassin to attend a presidential "meet and greet", and the assassin spread poison all over Kim Jong-un's face, and he died. At his autopsy, it was discovered that he had the tiniest penis ever on record, and he made it into the Guinness Book of World Records.

I wish Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz and Red would finally end the tension, and make out already. and let me watch in the background

Wish granted.

An owl swoops in and blocks your view. We then give you a quiz on exactly how we made out to make sure that you were paying attention but you can't answer it because the owl had made sure you could see nothing. You tell us about the owl but we don't believe you so we kick your head in. Then the owl comes and pecks your eyes out for being a snitch. Snitches get stitches.

I wish that I was President of the United States.

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz wrote: ↑Sun Feb 25, 2018 6:31 am

PsYcHo wrote: ↑Fri Feb 23, 2018 11:51 pm

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz wrote: ↑Fri Feb 23, 2018 10:43 am I wish that Kim Jong-un was the President of the United States.

Wish granted!

Unfortunately, to be POTUS, Kim Jong had to renounce his North Korean citizenship, wait until he was eligible for citizenship in the US, sponsor a law to allow naturalized citizens to run for the presidency, then win the election. All of which he did!

Unfortunately, the relative that replaced him as the Dictator of North Korea worried that he (Un) may have been trying to rule both 'Murica and North Korea. He sent an assassin to attend a presidential "meet and greet", and the assassin spread poison all over Kim Jong-un's face, and he died. At his autopsy, it was discovered that he had the tiniest penis ever on record, and he made it into the Guinness Book of World Records.

I wish Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz and Red would finally end the tension, and make out already. and let me watch in the background

Wish granted.

An owl swoops in and blocks your view. We then give you a quiz on exactly how we made out to make sure that you were paying attention but you can't answer it because the owl had made sure you could see nothing. You tell us about the owl but we don't believe you so we kick your head in. Then the owl comes and pecks your eyes out for being a snitch. Snitches get stitches.

I wish that I was President of the United States.

I'd like to change this wish to:

I wish Red could become President of the United States and I could become Vice President.

There, Red. If that isn't contribution, I don't know what is.

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz wrote: ↑Wed May 09, 2018 11:32 am
I'd like to change this wish to:

I wish Red could become President of the United States and I could become Vice President.

There, Red. If that isn't contribution, I don't know what is.

Wish granted.
Halfway into my second term, I am assassinated and you must take the helm. You are successful in continuing my policies and then some, and you have an approval rating of 98%. You abolish the second amendment, improve education and healthcare, fix the electoral college, strengthen international ties, and so on.

However, Kim Jong Un hears of you becoming president, and upon learning about your North Korean beliefs, suspects you of being a native North Korean and is convinced you defected from the country. He is super, duper pissed and uses all their nuclear missiles to blow up New York City, Chicago, Las Angeles, and of course, Washington D.C.. This of course happens after the progressions towards peace made by my predecessors and continued by me.

However, you were fortunately/unfortunately out of town when the missile hit the White House, and everyone gets really angry at you. Your approval ratings plummet to 2%, especially since you don't retaliate due to your pro-DPRK stances. Congress overrides your vetoes on bills that would nuke all of Eastern Asia, which causes an all out nuclear war, which you are helpless to do anything in, as Congress and the Supreme Court took away all of your powers as Article 2 is repealed. Then, if that wasn't bad enough, they find out that you weren't born in The United States, and call for your impeachment. You are unanimously convicted and thrown onto the streets where everyone flings their shit at you. You are forced into a large tub of shit which you must swim around in and then eat. You are then castrated, mutilated, cooked alive, then given to North Korea as a gift. They are thankful for this gift, and World Peace comes soon after, since PsYcHo is now president with somehow successful libertarian policies.

Then the aliens who were watching were angry that their entertainment was lost, so they just blow up Earth. But the bomb used was so immense that it blew up an entire universe, then somehow created a multiverse where Orange Man is God.

I wish I was never circumcised.

Red wrote: ↑Wed May 09, 2018 4:56 pm I wish I was never circumcised.

Wish Granted!

Future scientist revive your corpse following the assassination, and you are regenerated, foreskin and all.

You revive with full memory of the assassination, and while it takes a moment to regain composure after having died and been resurrected, you look down at your junk and are thrilled to find your foreskin attached! You are so happy, you begin to run and skip like a young man again.

Unfortunately, you didn't put on pants, and you trip over your newly renewed foreskin, tear it off at the base, and as you fall down in agony you slowly bleed out until you die once again. The Orange God finds this series of events hilarious, and deems that you shall replay your revival and second death until he no longer finds it funny. (So basically for eternity...or until a lesser god distracts him on GODTwitter.)



I wish that there was a way to make plants grow instantaneously.